Sometimes I think I have felt everything I’m ever gonna feel. And from here on out, I’m not gonna feel anything new. Just lesser versions of what I’ve already felt.
I have spent my life searching for a place to fit in.
I have wasted years on not trying things I should’ve
so I would have someone to say, “I accept you for who you are”,
but now I understand that it is conditional.
It’s “I accept you so long you look and act like me”,
it’s college campuses full of kids with laughs that sound like the groans of hell,
it’s high schools with puppets and textbooks,
it’s churches with hands stained in prayers and unanswered consciences.
It’s spilling your guts in a wastebasket
and listening to music you don’t enjoy.
It’s trying so hard not to be different in a bad way.
I have spent too much time and money on a life that I didn’t really want,
that I picked up by the critical eyes of my peers.
It’s the empty halls of recreational centers,
it’s the quiet.
Here’s the thing: if someone doesn’t love you for the music you like, the clothes you feel comfortable in, the gender you love, the scars you have on your body,
they aren’t worth the change.
If you like the top 40’s, then listen to the top 40’s.
If your arms are knotted from self harm, don’t hide beneath sweaters.
Let the sun kiss them, let the stars wash them. It’s not “fishing for attention”, it’s unapologetic, it’s real,
I don’t care what your classmates tell you.
If you feel comfortable in less clothes, them be comfortable in less clothes.
If you feel comfortable in more clothes, then feel comfortable in more.
If you want tattoos, get tattoos.
If you want to wear black every day, then wear it every day.
If you are gay, then you have the same human right to love who you want to
regardless of who tells you that you are wrong.
If you are sad, you owe no explanations. You owe no smiles.
The ones that judge you aren’t enough for you to walk on coals for their entertainment. Nothing is.
Here’s the thing: those kinds of people don’t want to see you as a better version of yourself,
but as a worse version of themselves.
You deserve better than that.
cause girls only say i hate you to the guys they love.
Create to be remembered,
Exist to be forgotten.
If you’re ever lucky enough to find a girl who is a hopeless romantic with a dirty mind, you should hold onto that. Because she’ll be yours at two in the morning and at two in the afternoon the following day. She’ll kiss you where it hurts and until it hurts. And that’s important. Someone who not only knows how to turn you on but also knows how to treat you right is someone worth a little something… and a little more than usual.